Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
I met a pornstar at his bachelor party and signed his shirt giving him wedding advice
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
Randomize
