is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
my mom just threw water on me to get me awake and is screaming "where is my fucking car?!"
you gave me a ride last nite what the hell did you do with it after you left me?
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
My vibrator broke.
Dude it's been less than twelve hours. Did you sleep?
Don't worry about that. I need a new vibrator.
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