i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
I found a Trump-humping republican virgin born on the goddamn Fourth of July. I NEED to hate-fuck him.
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
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