fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
i had a dream the other night i was titty fucking you while you were asleep, then you woke up and didn't care.
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
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