as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
Randomize
