Telling her that my penis is called megatron was not a good idea for a first date.
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
Get my husband this drunk again I will rip off your balls off with my bare hands and then cut them up with a dirty axe like fish bits. Do you understand me? DO YOU UNDERSTAND ME?! See you at breakfast, FUCK FACE. I'll shove that bottle of Jamison so far up your ass you'll still be praying in 2020 you can take a shit! Seriously, you make it hard to be your best friend.
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
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