Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
Damn victory sex feels great
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
Randomize
