The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
getting your period on valentines day is like an extra little fuck you, now you REALLY have no chance of sex tonight.
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
FUCK WHALES
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
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