Porn is love you can see.
Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
There is nothing wrong with watching parks and rec all day then getting blackout drunk by night
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
Randomize
