Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
I Pavlov-trained him by smacking him in the nuts anytime I caught him looking at another girl in public. To this day, he's afraid to break eye contact with me in a restaurant if a tall busty blonde walks in.
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
Drunk me says 72 hours of Mexican Viagra and room service.Sober me says we stopped being lovers for a reason after the last lost weekend.
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
