just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
Randomize
