What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
If I brought two seashells to Lowe's, do you think that they'd drill two holes in each shell for me? I need to be a mermaid on Saturday...
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
I wish the guy in the stall next to me would stop moaning while taking a dump.
I wish you'd stop texting me from the toilet.
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