ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
$5 long island pitchers = roommate pissing on his laptop at 3am.
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
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