yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
I took your shirt off for you after you threw up on yourself, read you the ugly duckling, and then tucked you in. you better fucking love me, jackass.
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
I don't know who the girl crying at my kitchen table eating gravy from the KFC container is, but I feel like she could be my soulmate
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
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