I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
i just woke up naked on my porch, holding the neighbors cat in my arms.
complete strangers are now referring to me as 'the bourbon guy.' i can live with this.
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
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