is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
Randomize
