The bar is so dead the tender gave us free shots for staying. They mixed 2pac and phil collins. That's worth at least three shots.
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
I’m home. Please don’t call me unless you have an arterial bleed or you’re on fire. Love you 😘
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone’s dad. You’re also like a second dad to me as well. And one who I send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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