apparently farting at a cop is considered assault.
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
Randomize
