Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
Just got caught pissing on a plant in her room while she was in the shower first word out of my mouth were my bad
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
Can someone please explain where the fish in the mason jar came from when we were at a bar all night?
You told the bartender if he gave you one of the fish you'd go away
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
Randomize
