oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
Need sex. Gaining weight.
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
"I wasn't planning on buying a chicken, but I bought it anyway." --some guy on the bus with a chicken
"Yeah, I only have nine toes." --that same guy
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
Randomize
