Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
Randomize
