can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
This is not a drunk text right now. This is an i want your dick text. There is a difference.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
You slow danced with your carpet steamer last night.
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
i black out too much to be "responsible"
Randomize
