Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
I woke up on a futon with 2 stolen budwiesers in my purse, 5 extra bucks, a sucker stuck to my shoe, one sock, and a stolen copy of the zombie survival guide
please tell me this is not legit
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
I say I'm working from home on conference call days, but really I just mute the phone, put that shit on speaker so I can hear what's going on, and let Marcus fuck my brains out.
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
Randomize
