Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
We told the pizza man that the door was most likely unlocked, he could leave the pizza on the counter and give himself 20%. He did it-I'm never moving out of Aspen.
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
Randomize
