I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
Still dying that you shit outside
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
Randomize
