You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
there is glitter all over my balls
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