Whoa Z and x make the same sound
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
Last night was epic. Hooked up with Emma Watson, found twenty bucks, and then passed out on my floor.
No you didn't. You drank unbelievable amounts of 151, passed out in someone else's bathroom, and we carried you back to your floor. Nice dreams though.
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
you were passed out so I asked you what my name was and you opened your eyes and yelled "ricotta cheese"
no way
that's when i decided you were gonna be okay
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
Some bitch is passed out in a pool of vomit. Fucking lightweight, it's only 8.30.
Oh, wait.. That's you.
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
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