I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
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