Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
Randomize
