He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
Randomize
