what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
He showed up at my apartment drunk with a telescope wanting me to look at the "blown up star" in -24 degree weather, claiming "it's in the name if science"
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
Randomize