he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
I LinkedIn messaged people about jobs when I was blacked out
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
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