My kitchen smells like failed pina coladas.
I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
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