my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
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