glad my latex allergy prevents me from being a one-night stand whore
People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
Mr. Last Night just informed me I told him to be very quiet when he left this morning and high-fived him as a goodnight kiss. Drunk me is slutty and manly.
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
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