I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
There are leaves in my underwear?
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
Randomize
