Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
Drunk texting is the poetry of my life
Randomize
