i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
Say "Steve Buscemi is hot." with a straight face.
i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
Say hello to your nephew Sir Isaac Meriwether van Catsworth
I'm going to have to start taking your phone after ten. That's when all the cat pictures come
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
Note to self: make sure the door is locked before the handcuffs go on.
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
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