you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
Just called my dad drunk from bed to ask for bacon.. my niece texted me when it was ready.. i'm never moving out
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
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