His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
Why do I feel like that's not the first time you've drank champagne with someone dressed as a unicorn?
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
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