there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
The girl at the liquor store remembered me as "the girl who pays in hundreds" so she didn't ID me
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Randomize
