Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
This whole bra on the outside of my shirt thing is so convenient. It turns my shirt into a pocket to eat Fritos out of. Mmm boobies
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
I dropped her off at home and her fiancé was shitty, it was 4:30 am. I told him I was the Uber driver
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Randomize
