This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
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