found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
I cam home to find him twitching on the floor, surrounded by unopened condoms and covered in cranberry sauce (yes I tasted it) while Thundercats was playing.
Randomize
