You were wearing a sombrero. And a crown. And told me to use the nerf gun to protect your room from the cat. You don't have a cat.
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
the bouncer made me realize that puking in line does not get you in any faster
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
Help me help you realize you are a moron
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
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