In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
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