We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
So he told me he wanted to fertilize my caviar. Im avoiding all foreign exchange students from now on.
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
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