butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
my favorite homeless guy just told me I drive like Batman, achievement unlocked
Today needs to die. The mail delivery guy watched me throw up in my yard while taking my chihuahua out in Christmas pajamas at noon. Low point in my life.
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
Well I accidentally flashed a 76 year old woman, i'm in a house full of republicans and Im almost drunk enough to give the gay rights speech so i'd say this wedding reception is going great
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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