Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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