I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
Shitshow foam night was such a success
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
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